Psychologist: 8 keys to ‘moving on’ from Past Trauma. Forgetting doesn’t work
Many traumatized people have a common fantasy: as long as we forget about the past, it will no longer affect us.Unfortunately, this is not possible.Recovery is not forgetting.Forgetting doesn’t help if you don’t succeed in getting back to normal.A psychology researcher who specialises in recovering from past trauma has come up with a golden rule for coping with trauma based on numerous case studies. I hope it works for you.(1) Successful recovery from childhood trauma does not involve forgetting what happened in the past.Forgive your abuser – you were told to do so to recover, or forced to do so.In short, it is not of your own volition.For everyone to “move on”.Cover up the past with empty “hope” and “future”.Becoming “cold,” “numb,” ignoring or suppressing your feelings in order to pretend nothing is happening.Live a “normal” life and interact with the world the way you’re told you should.Never feel depressed, anxious, sad or angry again, but just feel “good and positive” and “keep it light.”(2) Successful recovery from childhood trauma often requires the ability to acknowledge that you have experienced a past event and realize that it is over.Accept, note: “accept” simply means acknowledging what happened.And integrate the traumatic experience to form a narrative about what happened in your past and how it affected you.Identifying a boundary — physical, emotional, and psychological — that is best, right, and true for you helps you feel secure as you move forward.There are a number of ways that you can manage trauma symptoms and feel less upset and more calm when it comes to triggers.They are more resilient when it comes to trauma triggers — especially when shame, guilt and self-doubt are present.Whatever society and your family prefer, move toward an outer life that matches your inner life.Improve your ability to feel yourself and express them in a responsible and appropriate way.Conclusion: a past psychological trauma, just like a knife into your heart, you have to do is to pull out the knife, and heal their wounds.The definition of recovery varies from person to person, but there’s no doubt about it, but recovery is when you can look at past trauma and not let it affect your future life.